cosmicbrat
Joined: 02 Feb 2005
Posts: 51
Location: Mid Canada
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 Posted: Mon Feb 04, 2008 7:53 am Post subject: What is that wicked sting of breakup..? |
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...Two of us broke up when I caught her screwing a soldier on the couch in her apartment... the office closed early that day.. and I was drivin' me little spitfire to her for a couple hours of hot lovin'. I had the key to her place, and walked right in, and just stood there in Shock! STUNNED!.. HaH! he pulled out so Fast it made a sucking "PoP"... She added insult to injury by covering her pus with his soldier jackshirt, then her tits, but that left her pus showing.. A little confusion there sees I... The look on her face was undefinable, and still is...
The stud ran to the kitchen with his clothes... I just stood there, looking into her eyes... all I could see was a chunk of shit... I tried to speak, but right off I knew was voice wasn't working.. and I really didn't have anything to say... I panned the room, and panned her head to toe.. turned.. slowly stepping through the doorway...
I harnessed all that Rage, knowing it could have vaporized her in a flash if I had released it to fulfill itself...
...holding-back a ton of rage, "in one hand".. "in the other hand", I grit my teeth, and closed the door as quietly as I could close a door... I turned to face the stairs.. and tripped.. and caught the rail...
I barely got my legs working.. and nearly fell down the stairs.. I hugged that railing... My body felt like it weighed a ton.. My head ringing multiple loudish tones... It all made it extremely difficult to walk, think, breathe, stand...
I heard him laugh and say, "Did you see the Look on his face!?".. and she laughed that sweet high pitched giggle, the one that melts me.. but this time it Stung me like a spear just driven right through me.. and twisted like with a vengeance... like it was really happening... not a pardy...
I hung onto the railing real-tight.. and unbuttoned my shirt where it stung so Big... I checked for a hole and blood, and massaged the hot spot... I checked my back for a spear...
...I got my breath back, and barely made it down the stairs... my head feeling like it were seriously spinning inside... deafening screeching sounds in my head... There aren't words for it...
...In the car, I wondered why it wasn't moving..? I didn't hear the screeching tires.. They made the same sounds that were in my head...
When I released the gas peddle a little, the car suddenly moved forward Very FAST!.. Seems I left a huge set of long tire skid-marks on the road in-front of her place... I guess I just wanted to get away from her as fast as possible...
I drove a couple blocks.. but couldn't drive safely anymore.. I parked at the curb.. hugging the steering wheel.. feeling like a large chunk of me just got ripped out and shredded.. then ground into the dirt with a careless foot.. while feeling like I should be doing something so my body doesn't fragment...
...she was pregnant with my baby... her family moved to the other side of the continent... I heard she got married...
...15-years later, I'm just doing things, when I hear this mournful-cry in my mind, "clear as a bell".. a young girl's voice asking, "Who is this beast, molesting me, who claims to be my father?.. Who is my father?.. What is Truth?!"
It floored me... Immediately I dove deep into trance to checked it out... Turned-out it was my daughter on the other side of the continent, laying in bed, sobbing...
I lay beside my child, my cosmic-self, I held her close as I could to my Spirit.. She sensed me there, and stirred.. "Daddy?"...
I whispered into her mind, "You're Safe.. Sleep!"... I dropped the "sandman dust" (rubbed/shredded alpha-particle) over her head, and she instantly fell into ultra-deep sleep... I held my baby close for a couple hours, as long as I could maintain that extreme high-powered trance state, without my body dying... Caressing her back, her shoulders, while I made modifications in her power-core and thinking processes.. feeling her relax.. settling into deep sleep...
I rebuilt her mind while she slept... I built-in her all the extreme cosmic weaponry I knew, and all the stuff I didn't... I made her be more than me...
After a couple hours, my body was a freakin'... My heart couldn't take anymore deep trance.. it warned me of its condition with no uncertainty.. I had no op but to leave my baby, in her deep healing sleep, without having completed her refit...
...I bet she had some almighty wicked powerful dreams that night... the stuff feature-flics are made of...
A couple years later, she was in university, says her uncle, who still lived in my town...
I would love to be able to hold my baby just once.. then maybe some of the sting would go away...
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What is that "spear in the chest", wicked sensation???...
It sort of gives the feel like there's a tiny white-hot ball of fire burning deep inside your skin.. When you breathe you get the feel like maybe you just got speared with a Zulu spear.. feeling hot on the outside like it's bleeding profusely...
I quickly opened my shirt.. To my shock, there wasn't a spear hole.. and there wasn't any bleeding where it stung so big... and nothing sticking out my back..?
I held tight the rail.. I faced the stairs... My body felt like it weighed a ton...
I made it to the car... The world vanished... eventually I found where the key goes...
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Anyone else ever felt that gosh-awful spear-sensation..?
How did you manage to remain standing..?
What the h is it?..
..and why doesn't it ever go away..?
It stung like, when my spine got severed in a fall.. and when I got-up after fixing-it, and checked for blood by touching a little stick up under my shirt to that part of my back... And woke kneeling on my forearms, and sitting on my crossed ankles, with my forehead to the ground.. and a million tones ringing like an orchestra in my head... First a pleasant orchestra.. then changed to a wicked screechy rumbling pile of nauseating painful sounds, what seemed to originate outside, but not outside, nor inside..? And there was that wicked hot fire in my back...
What is that place in the mind..?
Has any ancient writer ever accurately described it..?
And, why does it Sting so Big..?
I bet that his lordship ShakaZulu invented his Zulu Spear after feeling that same sensation.. I bet he saw it like I saw it... When you feels it, you sees the spear for about a quarter-second, just before the sting blinds you... |
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